Right now I am in the middle of co-editing a documentary. Because of my belief that documentaries should not lead the people being interviewed this task has essentially become the equivalent of writing a script entirely using the zodiac killer's method of cutting words out of magazines.
I am also on the tenth draft of a feature film. Taking notes for a future book and planning a shoot, to rattle off a few things that I am working on.
I am incredibly frustrated.
And I love it.
When people tell you to "enjoy the journey" it is easy to dismiss that as an easy out for when things inevitably (in their mind) don't work out. But I don't think that is correct.
The whole point of enjoying the process or journey, is so that you keep working even after you have achieved your goal.
How many of us have lost weight for a special event only to gain it back again? How many "One Hit Wonders" disappear from the radio? How many actors win an Oscar and then fade into obscurity?
The problem with working exclusively for goals is that there is no motivation after you have achieved them.
But if you enjoy the process, if you enjoy the tedious hours getting something right, the problem solving, the challenge of working; well then you are on to something.
In almost every project I have ever made there has been a moment when I hate it. A moment when I wish I had never started it. And truly, there is nothing worse than making a movie, or writing a book, or painting a painting; except of course, not making it.
You have to love what you are doing. You have to love the self loathing, and the frustration. Maybe I need therapy, maybe I am masochistic, maybe my Narcissism has gone too far.
But I believe there is something special in making art. I don't believe in suffering for it, but I do believe that putting your soul out in the world is a difficult task.
And you need to enjoy it. If only because you are the only one that can do it.
Keep making art.